Ghosting occurs when someone you care about disappears without a trace or contact without any explanation. A 2016 study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships showed that out of 1300 study participants, 25% ghosted people, and 20% of the respondents have been ghosted. Ghosting avoids perceived confrontation, difficult conversations, and dealing with another’s hurt feelings. More recently ghosting has been occurring in platonic and employee relationships as well.
Ghosting in Employee-Employer Relationships
Unemployment rates are low and it’s a buyer’s market right now. The average job seekers are confident in their ability to obtain multiple job offers, as a result, people are ghosting jobs just as jobs used to ghost employees. Individuals with multiple job offers are having a difficult time juggling them and instead of turning now a job gracefully they choose to ghost. Often new employee accepts the job offer, completes the on-boarding and background process only to not show up the first day. Of course, companies, hiring professionals, and recruiters have been ghosting prospective employees for years, but now the tables have turned.
Ghosting in Romantic and Platonic Relationships
Quite often the person who has been ghosted is left with some devastating emotional effects and a possible decrease in self-esteem (for those who are more fragile). On occasions, the person that has been ghosted will track down the person who ghosted them leading to an embarrassing confrontation for both parties. Despite the bad reputation that ghosting has there are some moments when it is acceptable to ghost someone. Abusive, manipulative, and violent relationships are an acceptable time to use ghosting. The person who is abusing you does not require closure or a reason to you leaving. The goal at this point is to get out of the relationships safely.
I have several friends who have been ghosted in romantic and platonic relationships and to hear them speak about it there pain and hurt is palpable. Ghosting causes feelings of disrespect and being used and disposable. Additionally, it could cause future issues with vulnerability and trust down the road. For those that have been ghosted, focus on your internal happiness and understand that person wasn’t worth your time. Sooner or later, someone better will come along. Have you been ghosted or ghosted someone? Let me know why in the comments.